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Anything & Everything
Stories
My first love poem
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<blockquote data-quote="Undead_Lives" data-source="post: 115946" data-attributes="member: 5928"><p>I found it nice...change in ryhming sceme kinda made it like a song since you repeated it...but anways, nice. Couple things though.</p><p>1. You spelled plainly wrong in the second paragraph, but right in the sixth (counting the one line as a paragraph). So... <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite12" alt="o_O" title="Er... what? o_O" loading="lazy" data-shortname="o_O" /></p><p>2. </p><p>I would like to see something other than another up here. It just makes the poem more colorful.</p><p>3. To improve poems in the future, try getting away from the simple words. Unless it's meant to be simple, and in that case nevermind <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Undead_Lives, post: 115946, member: 5928"] I found it nice...change in ryhming sceme kinda made it like a song since you repeated it...but anways, nice. Couple things though. 1. You spelled plainly wrong in the second paragraph, but right in the sixth (counting the one line as a paragraph). So... o.O 2. I would like to see something other than another up here. It just makes the poem more colorful. 3. To improve poems in the future, try getting away from the simple words. Unless it's meant to be simple, and in that case nevermind :D [/QUOTE]
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Anything & Everything
Stories
My first love poem
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