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<blockquote data-quote="Fladian" data-source="post: 118741" data-attributes="member: 5833"><p>[starts talking to himself]I typed this post before I went to work today... but decided not to post it and deleted it instead. I'm starting to hesitate posting stuff... not good Fladian. Bad boy.[stops talking to himself]</p><p></p><p>Hmm... as far as I know, I don't owe her anything. Though I did make two promises to her, one that is known by someone else as well, and the other is only known by her. Those are the following promises: "Whatever happens, I'll support you in every way possible," and "I won't change and I'll always be there for you when you need me." Though somewhat similar to each other, they both have something else in it that gives them a completely different meaning.</p><p>I haven't broken a promise since I was 18 and am planning to keep it that way. No matter how hard (able to leave things behind just to ensure safety) or strange (holding a speech upon graduating) those promises may be.</p><p></p><p></p><p>The promises I made to her and a friend are indeed related to her unstability, but this involves something else as well. Something that no one has influence on, considering that we never discovered what the cause of it was.</p><p>I made that first promise because of her instability. The second promise was made a short time ago, when she was getting into fights with someone she is supposed to trust the most. </p><p></p><p>Raiju, you're the type of guy who should know someone - or am - who crops up all his problems and just "smiles over it." I'm such a type of person, though I know it's a bad thing. Considering that I also collect stress, it's a strange combination. But mostly because of that, I need someone that I can talk to... talk about everything that is bothering me.</p><p>Despite that I trust my <em>real</em> friends more than anything else, I don't dare to go to some of them because... well, anything could happen, I guess. I have no real reason for not doing so. Therefore, when something is bothering me, I step to a forgein friend of mine. His personality matches mine nearly completely, despite that our appearance is completely the opposite of each other (no joke). He is like me, also a logical thinker and we usually come to the same conclusion when thinking about something. Knowing that it is likely that we'll never meet, it is a good way to trust him.</p><p>What he is for me, am I for her. When something is bothering her, she immediately comes to me. This was not my decision, though I would suggest it if necessary. That is how the second promise came to exist.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Not really, unfortunately. I wish it was as easy to do something as you mentioned. Just to "scratch myself and break some bones" in order to change the situation. </p><p></p><p>I know that I am together with that specific girl but both she and I know that my feelings are bigger and more passionate to someone else. I could lie to myself and her that that isn't the case, but such lies never last long (enough) in such a situation.</p><p>There is very little I can do with the girl I have more feelings for though. We're friends and nothing more. That she is aware that I like her is something I can say with much confidence. I've done some stuff someone who would just want to be friends usually wouldn't do. ("Go home already! How often has your bus come by now? Eleven, twelve times?", "I'm not leaving you here alone.") Despite that I do all that kind of stuff, she apparently doesn't find it unpleasant to be around me as she never really mentioned anything negative about it. Considering my experience in those kind of stuff, I tend to notice such things quite fast. I tend to talk with double side words after all. But despite all that, I never made an actual move on her. But that's just my kind of personality; too indirect.</p><p></p><p>It was never my intention to fall for that girl in the first place.</p><p></p><p></p><p>She definitely is, in my opinion. But what else do you expect to hear from the guy who fell for her? <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite7" alt=":p" title="Stick Out Tongue :p" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":p" /></p><p>("I've seen you with a different hair-cut before. You weren't satisfied back then... you aren't now either, are you?", "well, it'll grow back on.")</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fladian, post: 118741, member: 5833"] [starts talking to himself]I typed this post before I went to work today... but decided not to post it and deleted it instead. I'm starting to hesitate posting stuff... not good Fladian. Bad boy.[stops talking to himself] Hmm... as far as I know, I don't owe her anything. Though I did make two promises to her, one that is known by someone else as well, and the other is only known by her. Those are the following promises: "Whatever happens, I'll support you in every way possible," and "I won't change and I'll always be there for you when you need me." Though somewhat similar to each other, they both have something else in it that gives them a completely different meaning. I haven't broken a promise since I was 18 and am planning to keep it that way. No matter how hard (able to leave things behind just to ensure safety) or strange (holding a speech upon graduating) those promises may be. The promises I made to her and a friend are indeed related to her unstability, but this involves something else as well. Something that no one has influence on, considering that we never discovered what the cause of it was. I made that first promise because of her instability. The second promise was made a short time ago, when she was getting into fights with someone she is supposed to trust the most. Raiju, you're the type of guy who should know someone - or am - who crops up all his problems and just "smiles over it." I'm such a type of person, though I know it's a bad thing. Considering that I also collect stress, it's a strange combination. But mostly because of that, I need someone that I can talk to... talk about everything that is bothering me. Despite that I trust my [i]real[/i] friends more than anything else, I don't dare to go to some of them because... well, anything could happen, I guess. I have no real reason for not doing so. Therefore, when something is bothering me, I step to a forgein friend of mine. His personality matches mine nearly completely, despite that our appearance is completely the opposite of each other (no joke). He is like me, also a logical thinker and we usually come to the same conclusion when thinking about something. Knowing that it is likely that we'll never meet, it is a good way to trust him. What he is for me, am I for her. When something is bothering her, she immediately comes to me. This was not my decision, though I would suggest it if necessary. That is how the second promise came to exist. Not really, unfortunately. I wish it was as easy to do something as you mentioned. Just to "scratch myself and break some bones" in order to change the situation. I know that I am together with that specific girl but both she and I know that my feelings are bigger and more passionate to someone else. I could lie to myself and her that that isn't the case, but such lies never last long (enough) in such a situation. There is very little I can do with the girl I have more feelings for though. We're friends and nothing more. That she is aware that I like her is something I can say with much confidence. I've done some stuff someone who would just want to be friends usually wouldn't do. ("Go home already! How often has your bus come by now? Eleven, twelve times?", "I'm not leaving you here alone.") Despite that I do all that kind of stuff, she apparently doesn't find it unpleasant to be around me as she never really mentioned anything negative about it. Considering my experience in those kind of stuff, I tend to notice such things quite fast. I tend to talk with double side words after all. But despite all that, I never made an actual move on her. But that's just my kind of personality; too indirect. It was never my intention to fall for that girl in the first place. She definitely is, in my opinion. But what else do you expect to hear from the guy who fell for her? :P ("I've seen you with a different hair-cut before. You weren't satisfied back then... you aren't now either, are you?", "well, it'll grow back on.") [/QUOTE]
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