My inactivity

[Xeridanus]

aren't we prying a bit too much, it's stressful enough as it is... he removed the whole (whole enough for interent) story for a reason. im surprised actually that he hasnt locked this topic. really, this topic should have stopped at "well i hope everything gets better for you in the future, don't be inactive for long." it is not good maners to be talking about someones situation when they clearly don't want it up for disscusion. otherwise he would have left it here, for everyone to see. i bring to the foreground the title of the topic: My Inactivity. i am not saying that you, Undead_Lives, are a naturally impolite person, everyone forgets their manners. all im saying (to everyone) is give the guy a break.

Of course, i cannot speak directly for Flad. so my defending him is based purely on my own feelings on the subject. but im reasonbly sure he would feel similar.

 

[Fladian]

*scratches the back of his head*
It's a little hard to quote while at work, mind you.

That someone died because of me is a fact, but I am not interested in going into details of that. The girl I mentioned is related to this situation - if not the cause - but she is not the one who died. The one who did is related to her more though. More than most of you could possibly imagine.

Xer, I did not close the thread because I am still hesitating of what I am going to say. It is a subject that I am quite sensitive about, but I find it hard to keep to myself. Besides that, there are only a handful of people I dare to tell because I do not want to involve them in this mess. I already involved far too many people.
The questions are all fair, and as long as I answer them, everything is just fine. My thanks for saying it though. But even though you (Xeridanus, red.) are aware of the situation, I never did tell you a few details. The fact that someone died because of me, is something I never told you, yet did happen. It is argumentable if I am completely responsible for it, but that is not part of this discussion.

 

[Undead_Lives]

Ugh, I'm dropping out of this, it's starting to get confusing.. :/

 

[Fladian]

Funny, because everything I just said still makes perfectly sense. If you'd finally use some common sense, you'd might understand it.

Whatever you don't understand should still be quite simple.

 

[Raiju]

It is not much of a problem for those who are not directly involved. For those are involved, however, the story quickly changes. Ask yourself this, and you'll find the answer why everything is such a mess. Name the five worst things that could happen to a young girl, and let it all happen in less than six months of time.
[/b]

In my (what some people may call chauvinist) mind, the 5 worst things that can happen to a young girl are:

-Unwanted pregnancy
-Sterelity (ironic, inst it?)
-Cancer
-Hatred toward men
-Painful death

i can think about what kind of problem youre having but nevermind, its not of my business even to guess it

just chill out and go on. you see, no matter what you say, you still have some humor to write quotes o'days

so maybe things wil get right. if they wont, fuc.k them, its your life that matters most

 

[Fladian]

For those who read my previous post and found it offensive, I think I owe them an apology. It is unlike me to apologize in public and actually mean it, (how often does that happen? Though admitted that the last time wasn't all that long ago just yet) but I probably had an off moment. I already learned that I am starting to act a bit... strange when exposed to more heath than I'm used to. This heath-wave really isn't having a good effect on me. Note that inside the company (the place I work, red.) it has been more than 32 degrees celcius throughout most of the day. That probably affected me quite badly... and if that wasn't the case, then it was probably my new (well, not so new anymore, I guess) chief.
("Why didn't you take the ice-cream?" - Me
"I don't take anything he offers." - A colleague)
Again, my apologies.

In my (what some people may call chauvinist) mind, the 5 worst things that can happen to a young girl are:

-Unwanted pregnancy
-Sterelity (ironic, inst it?)
-Cancer
-Hatred toward men
-Painful death[/b]

Considering that she isn't dead, one of them would immediately fall. Two of them are, however, true. I made a somewhat different list though. But considering one of them is the result of the other, it is only logical.

And believe me. There are things worse than a "painful death," some things I hope I'll never have to experience myself... considering this already hurts enough.

i can think about what kind of problem youre having but nevermind, its not of my business even to guess it[/b]

You are free to do so, but it is a matter that is quite hard to guess. Not only is the problem quite deep and complicated (in the end), but it is mostly a chain reaction of several problems pilling up (and finally falling down) involving all the same people. If you can guess the details, you'd be psychic.
Especially love is important for someone like her. For someone who got a train-load of horrible experiences right after each other is especially in need of someone to care fpr her. I said I would care for her, but I never offered my love... and she knows that.

In the end, another 'person' (if I am using the right word) entered this mess, and that is the 'person' who... also... well, I mentioned it before; but I prefer not to keep repeating it. I do not like repeating a mistake that big.

just chill out and go on. you see, no matter what you say, you still have some humor to write quotes o'days[/b]

It is quite hard to chill out knowing that I am responsible for someone's death and after hearing a couple of things about it, Raiju. I am able to take tremendous amounts of stress and only broke down twice because of it (one of them being that my mother was in critical condition and I was stuck with my first hang over; happening one day after my 18th birthday).

This situation, however, is the worst possible situation imaginable and I am out of options. I never would have involved other people if it didn't get this badly out of hand.

This humor I am using (especially lately) is empty, Raiju. The quote of the days are also little things to remember the days by. Some people keep a diary, I merely keep a quote. Tomorrow I'll collect all quotes of those from my colleagues and what happened at work and report it to my boss, Ramon. After that, I am taking my leave and am going to enjoy my vacation 'till every single bit. Or at least, until the 16th of August, after that, all the mess is just going to get back where it was earlier.

so maybe things wil get right. if they wont, fuc.k them, its your life that matters most[/b]

My life that matters most, so I am supposed to give up on all others? Turning my back to two people I care for the most and one person who cares for me? No, that is the last thing I am going to do. I always placed my self on a second spot, finding other people more important than myself. "What do I got to lose anyway," is always what I said. This changed dramatically throughout this year. The (my) feelings towards a specific girl are not playing a role in this matter, the feelings of other people towards me, however. Stepping out is going to hurt someone else more than that it is going to hurt me. Again, I place myself on the second place.

As for your statement of "fuck them;" I already did.

 

[Undead_Lives]

Apology Accepted...
But I'm not gonna use up time just to figure out what's going on in your life.
You're going to be inactive, ok, fine. That's all I need to know.

 

[Raiju]

If you can guess the details, you'd be psychic.
Especially love is important for someone like her. For someone who got a train-load of horrible experiences right after each other is especially in need of someone to care fpr her. I said I would care for her, but I never offered my love... and she knows that.

In the end, another 'person' (if I am using the right word) entered this mess, and that is the 'person' who... also... well, I mentioned it before; but I prefer not to keep repeating it. I do not like repeating a mistake that big.[/b]

Im not a psychic, but i was guessing it was about that girl. Thats tough, especially for someone like you (or what i think its like you, after everything you wroted about her)

My life that matters most, so I am supposed to give up on all others? Turning my back to two people I care for the most and one person who cares for me? No, that is the last thing I am going to do. I always placed my self on a second spot, finding other people more important than myself. "What do I got to lose anyway," is always what I said. This changed dramatically throughout this year. The (my) feelings towards a specific girl are not playing a role in this matter, the feelings of other people towards me, however. Stepping out is going to hurt someone else more than that it is going to hurt me. Again, I place myself on the second place.[/b]

Ay, ay, I knew you would write something like that. You stroke the heart of the question, abandon those whom you love is the last thing you should do. But if you cant fix the mess, and cant do anything about it now, torturing yourself is not the solution mate. You see, its quite dificult for me to imagine myself in your place, being your personality so different than mine and being completely ignorant about your current situation (i can only guess). That was just my way of trying to help you, its not that iam selfish, its just that i at least, dont like to lose time and energy with something i cant change. If you cant be like that, at least try to chill out. A calm mind thinks better

Im outta here. Good luck

 

[Xeridanus]

I agree with Raiju and Undead_Lives. I agree with U_L in that we should all do the same. i agree with raiju in his advice towards the "situation". when there is nothing you can do, try to relax. find a good game (or a new one) and let it absorb you.